Doorsteps of Heaven

‘Everything you ever do,’ Paul says, ‘will be from the inside looking out.’ My stomach drops as I begin to catch myself. Inside looking out, the words rattle back and forth in my head. I never feel that way, I always feel like I am on the outside looking in.

‘Believe the resurrection,’ Paul continues, ‘it’s the historical reality of you inside.’

I begin to think of how many jobs I have wanted. How I was outside. All of the friends and girlfriends, I was outside. My own family, I was outside. I have awakened each morning feeling like I was outside without even knowing it.

‘You better start living this reality, this is eternity, this is all coming with us.’ I have no words to add to that. ‘This is the inside.’

‘You can’t drop your deeds at heaven’s doorstep,’ Paul says, ‘with fingers crossed. Naivete is no virtue.’


About Rene Diebenkorn

Lifetime Artist. ETC.

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